Freedom
“But the man who looks intently into the perfect law that gives freedom, and continues to do this, not forgetting what he has heard, but doing it—he will be blessed in what he does.”
James 1: 25
It seems almost like a paradox doesn’t it? A law that gives freedom?
A law tells one what to do and what not to do, it binds someone. How, then, can it give freedom?
But the law of the Lord is such that it gives freedom. The law of the Lord is for the sole purpose of giving us freedom. For God made us free and it is sin which binds us and hinders us from being truly free.
I try, believe me I do. I try to do what the Law wants me to, so that I can be free to worship and love my Creator. Yet, I always fall. There is a perfectionist in me that cannot stand this. Why do I keep falling, sinning, despite perpetually trying not to?
With each sin I commit, I pull myself further away from God, further away from Freedom. With each sin I commit, I become a little less capable of not committing another sin. With each sin I commit, I become a little less free, a little more bound, and a little less whole.
Yes, the Blood has been spilled, the Body, broken. The Son of God, crucified, to bear the sin I commit, to bear the brokenness I create, to be bound to the bondage I tie.
On one hand, I am grateful that He loves me such that He doesn’t want me to suffer, even though I deserve it. On the other hand, I am disgusted at myself for making the One I love suffer when He doesn’t deserve it.
I want to be free. I want to be the free person that I have been made to be.
St Anastasia, you know what it is like to be tempted as you so strongly fought against it before, up in Heaven watching over me, please pray for me.
St Michael, Archangel, on His command, you watch over me. Please guard me from temptation.
My own Guardian Angel, you have saved me from death at my hands, hurt at the hands of others and pain from my own doing. Please help me free myself from this sin.
Mother Mary, Mater Dei, you who carried the Son of God Himself in your womb. You who was conceived perfect, you who remained sinless for all your life. Please pray for me.
Jesus Christ, who not only died a painful death but also lived a life so full of temptation but never once faltered. Daddy, dear, I have so much to ask of You. I am sorry and ask for Your forgiveness. You love me and I ask that I may learn to love You back. I am broken and ask that You will heal me. I weep and ask that You will hold me. I am bound and ask that You will free me.
Amen.
On a completely unrelated note: This pattern game is so addictive!
